Actually, maybe more like 2025? I will leave that to the futurists.

I stayed at home today to look after Helen, she’s really sick. She seems chirpier, however, if not any healthier. Anyway, in lieu of anything interesting happening, I shall copy/paste something I wrote last night instead of doing any reading for marketing.

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I like watching people.

No, not in a creepy way, in an ethnographical kind of way (I’d cool, I’ll wait if you need to look that up) – you can tell a lot about someone from just watching them walk by.

Like, you might see someone keep glancing at something that’s not there. You know nothing’s there because they always look in the same direction, regardless of where they’re facing. It’s not a whole-head-moving thing, just an eyeball glance, and they always seem kind of anxious. They’ll be checking their email for a delivery confirmation, eager to know if you got that thing they sent you. Maybe they sent a message they shouldn’t have, or perhaps it’s the new proposal to Steve to present to the board tomorrow. Sure, there are extensions to make sure you’re alerted to them the same way you are to actual mail, but even then it’s hard to un-learn the behaviour when you’re anxious. Like glancing deliberately at the icon can make it update differently somehow (which it could, actually, until a couple of years ago under Windows anyway).

These last couple of months Windows users have been sticking out like a sore thumb. Everyone who dutifully grabbed last month’s crucial updates (and let’s face it, who’d dare not to?) twitches slightly every seven steps. Something to do with the new, more secure garbage collection routines, I don’t know. They’re working on it, of course, but honestly? I’m not sure anyone minds too much. Windows users are a hardy sort, they’ve been putting up with stuff like this for years now and it’s nothing compared to some of the more news-worthy bugs. Hell, last year there was a solid week in which none of them could jump. Thankfully jumping is a little-used skill in the modern world, but there were a couple of high-profile accidents before a patch surfaced.

Linux users are more subtle. The dead give-away is when you actually try and talk to one, of course. Vocal communication’s not really been worth bothering with since kernel 12.4, when the community embraced a set of extensions from an enterprising young Thai kid. Effectively, they’re all telepathic, every man jack one of them. Other systems are more or less interoperable now, though not so polished, so the Linux kids only really have to engage their mouths when speaking to someone like me, without anything running on top of their brain (or under it, whatever – a precise metaphor eludes me). As such, there’s this kind of pause, as they remember what the muscles are for. In the worst cases, the early adopters who haven’t spoken for upwards of two years, it can be like conversing with a deaf person. What with that, and the now-traditional smell, I don’t talk to Linux folks unless I have to.

Sometimes you’ll see someone walking in some bizarre counter-intuitive fashion. They’re those early-adopters again (which at least makes them easy to avoid), beta-testing new locomotion algorithms or something. Efficiency nuts, always striving to shave that last extra watt/meter off their walk to the coffee place. Which, if it’s Starbucks, will be totally mac-user free. Something about the new payment system requires some Windows-only security protocols. The linux kids have reverse-engineered it, of course, but the mac guys are stuck drinking in Cafe Nero, at least for the time being. They’re really cashing in on it there: iCoffee is now their best-selling blend. It’s French.

Speaking of mac users, they’re pretty easy to spot too – it’s in the walk. They’re not like the early adopters mind you, the mac walk is one of elegance, and just a little bit of “I’m better than you”. At first it doesn’t look too different to any other walk, but then you look closer. Every tiny movement is governed by Apple’s new “core-motion” engine. There was a big noise when it was announced – apparently hand-coded under the supervision of Italian choreographers – and while I doubt it’s as efficient as whatever the beta-testers propel themselves with it sure is elegant; I gather it’s nigh-on impossible to get acting work without it.